Unspoken (A Poem by Jan Decena)

“You would think that
if words were not spoken are easier to handle,
You would never have to endure
every syllable, every sound and each of their voices
And you never know that
you were being made a fool of
But that is okay, right?
Because you would never see
those lips moving and those taunting eyes.

You would turn a blind eye
maybe for a few days or so,
Just to settle down with yourself,
Breathing in and breathing out.
But you eventually have to look on that other side
and see those words you never wanted to hear,
Innocent consonants and vowels
manipulated into monsters and demons
And your nightmare, in the blink of an eye,
Has turned into a painful and tragic reality.

Denial became your policy
and maybe you hold on to that hope,
That they will go away, vanish into thin air,
That you will sleep soundly with the stars tonight.
But then you would look into those words again
feeling every syllable in your very own lips,
Astounded that, even though it hurts so bad,
It sounded so painfully right as it settled
down in your chest and it devoured your heart.
There were never any stars guiding you,
There was never a guardian angel saving you,
There was never any love given to you.
Because you have finally learned,
From these unspoken powerful words,
That you never deserve them.

And no one will care,
If you ever say your last goodbye.”

This poem was my first published poem on the UKC Illustrated Anthology 2013-2014. I am not too sure what made me write this sad piece. Probably the usual culprit – sad music and left-over emo feelings when I was a teenager.

Follow me shenanigans on Twitter: Jan_Decena
Follow me shenanigans on Instagram: jan_decena


2 thoughts on “Unspoken (A Poem by Jan Decena)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s